Never say never....

6 months ago this wasn't happening...
No way no how, no chance...No money..no motivation, nothing...I had to watch a boat load of you tube videos to keep myself from ebaying my bike...it wasn't going to happen until I made it happen.
a $400 dollar gamble...should have spent the money on other things, paid bills, only 4 months in the dead of winter to train.

3 months ago...this wasn't happening...only 3 months to train for an Ironman in the coldest winter in decades...snow and cold every weekend no way to train out doors...just hopping on the treadmill and the trainer if it wasn't bad 8-10 miles outside...there was no way that this cold prep me for an ironman could it?
The weather broke...managed to get some out door runs and rides in again, sucked it up and was ridding the trainner from 2-4 hours 3 days a week.

1 month ago ..this wasn't happening...my ortho shows me the x-ray of y ankle..."you've got microtears in your tendon...you should stay off it for atleast month."
"I've got an ironman in 6 weeks " I shout back...
"You can swim" he replies...
"Can I bike?"
"Well"
CAN I BIKE?" I say more firmly knowing if I can't cycle it's truly game over.
"Yes" he says reluctantly
"I there anything that can heal my leg faster? " I ask
" Anti-inflamatories although it will only take about a week off."
3 weeks of no run training and just pushing the swim and the bike...surely the sart thing is to drop out....

1Week ago...I can't believe this is happening...flight's booked, bike's packed I managed to get the last of my long training in...I actually feel ready....
For all the reasons it shouldn't of happen, couldn't have happended it is happening...

again.

Time To Taper

I ran my long run, the leg survived, there is no need to push the distance anymore.
I have done more long rides and trainer sessions that last year...I can back off now.
The black line at the bottom of the pool has become a blur, I can reduce my yardage.

Race day is 13 days away and now since I have thrown together my best efforts I can relax a little. Now more worrying about building up more mileage on the run, no more worrying can I cram one more 4+ hour ride in. No more worring "will the Achilles Survive?" What I have done over the last few months to prep has been done. Now the distances will get a little shorter, I can rest up a little more, and hopefully on March 7 I will fly with no major issues.
The prep work is complete now it's off to the races.
R.D.

I can't run for at least a week

Well I went to my ortho and recieved a diagnosis of Tendonosis (micro tears.) the result a reccomended rest of 4 weeks without running...barebones minimum 2 weeks off start running when the swelling goes down on your Achilles,unless you want a rupture. There are 4 options of what I can do:

1. Ignore the Doc run on my leg and have a 50/50 shot of a marathon PR or a season ending tendon rupture. I'm Crazy not stupid the idea of a tear is enough to scare me straight.

2. Scrap Ironman New Zealand beat my head against the wall for wasting $400, enter Providence 70.3 and take my rage out on the Half Ironman speedsters in July...be afraid be very very afraid. I really don't want to eat $400 bucks.

3. Sit here and mope about how I can't run for two weeks..oh woe as me..eat fattening foods and generally make a mess of myself. Tempting but what gets done that way?

4. Take the two weeks I can't run and focus more on swimming and cycling. See this unplanned rest as mandatory cycling focus, use the orthodics in my bike shoes build mileage and hence improve my weakest event. Get my swimming from top 60 to flirting with course record status. Go to Taupo pilage the field on the swim and bike and hold on Normann Stadler style on the run. We have a winner!

Ok so I'm not a huge fan of the Norminator but I guess if I want to have a positive outlook on not being able to work my usual second strength, I need to work my weakness if I want a shot of a Kona slot or finishing in Daylight. My swim is stellar, my cycling is improving and now my marathon which is normally a no brainer is now a question mark. All I can do is swim and spin and hopefully in two weeks begin to build my run mileage back up.

Thankfully this weekend it's supposed to be cold, but no snow so hopefully it will be an ideal weekend to ride, On tap for tonight masters maybe an hour or two on the trainer. Now that I know what I've hurt and to what extent I know what I have clearance to train it's time to put in more of the work..hopefully weather and classes will co-operate.

R.D.

140.6 is the Easy Part: Part II The costs and the benefits.

Well for anyone who hasn't been following this blog or the my other one I'm in debt, like 90% of the US population. My family's in kind of a tough spot which has led to some tensions between my parents and myself and the fact that I have fallen behind on some stuff..granted I'll be able to catch up with the income tax check. But irregardless this summer was pretty bad, and I've resolved to get myself into a better position. As I was going through fiscal hell and now as I sit here looking at my bills, projected income, and race expenses, I felt it necessary to rehash why I want to spend the money to go half way around the world and race against some of the World's best athletes.

The Place: New Zealand is probably one of my favorite places on earth. It reminds me of Connecticut with better weather with people who are a hell of alot less up tight...hell even the road work signs say thank you. The long stretch of Broadlands road on the Taupo Course reminds me alot of my training route through Woodbury and Washington ( Granted a little less hilly.) The way the entire town got behind the event save for a few reckless drivers, was amazing. And unlike alot of the American Races where everything is about having the decked out Cervelo and the Zipp wheel set and the be all and end all coaching plan...the Aussies and Kiwis I bumped into were serious competitors but it was more as Charisa put it "about the journey that the destination."

Last year as part of the race's adopt an Ironman Program the Taupo Times picked me out of the draw so I had a conceige in Jude ( far right) personal check in volunteer ..well ok I just happended to check in at the right timeand she helped me in Gerri ( center.) And a press entourage.

The People: I've already hit on the Aussies and Kiwi's "no worries" attitude and sadly I wish it was something I had more of. I also met some people from across

the US at this shin dig that had similar attitudes it was just an experience that put me in contact with so many different cultures and lifestyles it reminded me of one of the reasons I love the sport so much.

Catherine is the Brunette on the far left, the guy on the End is Simon the local sports reporter sadly he moved to Australia if you're out there dude shoot me an email.

There is one person imparticular I'm hoping to see...my friend Catherine, she is just an amazing person, funny,pretty smart, sporty, amazing smile, stunning photographer ...she asked me once about nutrition before a race to which my reply was "well I have some gu taped to the bike some shot blocks in my pocket and if all else fails a bottle of coke and Snickers waiting for me in my special needs bag." I'm not a health food nut, hell I was one of those kids who ate Jello out of the box in age group swim meets. So I always would get a kick when she'd say " I don't know how to cook for an athlete." But on her photography last year she was working for the town paper so she and Simon the Sports reporter were my press entourage for the week. Sadly the paper made some personnel changes Cat's still in NZ and is working out of New Plymouth and Simon is somewhere in Australia, she's confirmed she'll be at the race so I'm really looking forward to seeing her and catching up. The race photos in this post were snapped by her and Simon at last year's Ironman New Zealand the two on the run were snapped 10k from the finish as Catherine leaned backward out of the passenger side window to get the shot. Not an easy task to do but it made for some great shots.

This photo is my personal favorite...mainly because it's not always easy to smile 20 miles into a marathon.

I could go into strategic planning and all that crap of "hey if I qualify for Kona...I'd have X months to train,and save up..." but in reality there was not any logical sense for me to enter Ironman New Zealand. Logic and rationality would have told me to do something closer like Louisville or Placid, or Arizona, something easier like Florida. Something late in the year, cheap to get to, and hopefully loaded with the 30 and older crowd. Sometime emotions just trumps the mind. Will I be able to afford to go back every year? I don't know, realistically I'm doing it this year on a wing and a prayer. I didn't use Ken Glah's service to cut costs ( although if you can afford to do a race with his group highly recommend it,in fact his mechanics for Ironman New Zealand were riots.) As I felt in the summer of 2007 money is only money, I can always make more.

At the end of the day when they're laying me into a 6ft.box am I'm going to be sitting there thinking I should have hoarded more, I should have worked more, I should have fired my damn stock broker in the recession, or that I should have lived more, I should have traveled more, I should have laughed more, I should have loved more...don't get me wrong I need to pay bills and establish myself and I will but am I living to work or am I working to live. What's the sense of life if you can't do at least some of what you want to do.

I think I answered that question.

R.D.

140.6 is the easy part....Part I.

The greater the adversity the greater the victory...

I had used this phrase a couple of time to egg on some of my friends as they went through some issues with their races. Now I suddenly find myself trying to take heart in them, to understand them.

Last year I did Ironman New Zealand this year I'm going back. Amid all the economic meltdown crap and the million other important things I should have on the front burner.I'm doing it. Part of me wonders why? Selfish, insane, just wanting to have something good to look forward to? I think part of it is just to see if my own words were an unfeltgeneric condolence or an actual phenomena.

Last year I was on a training ride with Claire as she was preping for Vineman and I had taken 2 weeks of recoup time. As we suffered up through the Connecticut hills she came along side and asked " so Bobby in all honesty how bad was it? How bad was the pain? The suffering?"
As I sat there and pedaled the funniest thing happended I couldn't remember the pain. Sure I was stiff after, and my heels were torn up like raw hamburger. It was pouring rain and my sinuses were running like a sieve but I couldn't remember the negative. Just being there to race was a blessing. Friends and Co-workers helped me out with encouragement and a little cash so I wouldn't be living off of PBand J for the week I was there, one of my buddies drove me to the airport the day after a snow storm dumped nearly 2 feet of snow on us . I met some awesome people made a few friends ( from the states) made a couple of good friends in New Zealand. The other thing is if racing is supposed to be enjoyable why focus on the negative,like the suffering and injuries.Sure I blistered and have blood stains in my racing flats from that rain soaked marathon but I also had a PR in that marathon...a marathon PR in the ironman ...after stopping to use the facilities and doing a Blazeman log roll...a marathon PR after a 2.4 mile swim a 112 mile bike and cramming in whatever hodgepodge running I could.

So now this year...I have bills, I have school, I have family crisises, I have the same stuff I had to deal with last year...I'm trying to cram my training in the same way I did last year except I'm a little bit further behind because of weather and it took me so long to decide to enter. So now here I sit again racing the New England winter, an approaching race,bills, a college smester, other crisises that flare and recede... essentially March 7, 2009 is going to be the fun part.

R.D.

You're Nuts!

" We do not do these things not because they are easy, we do these things becasue they are hard..."

-JFK



Well last year as I sat here prepping for Ironman New Zealand I kept getting a constant reminder of my mental health.



" You're training for an Ironman, do you know what that'll do to your knees? You're nuts!"



" You're training for an Ironman in the dead of winter...you're nuts!"



" You're going to New Zealand in the worst economic situation since the Great Depression? You're nuts!"



" You think you'll qualify for Kona? Damn you're nuts boy-o!"



" You want to go back? You're not nuts you're f**king insane dude!"



Last year I did not let these thoughts deter me. The last year has been rough with life just wailing on me, part of it was my over ambition, some of it was unforeseen circumstances, most of it was how I reacted to shit. Funny it seems that when I race 95% of the time, if something happens I just roll with it, but life throws me a curve ball, and I let it bug me. I stress, I worry, I fret and go into panic mode and then a few hours/days/ weeks down the line take a deep breath and deal with it, kicking myself for being such a dumbass. Mayb I need to view life like I view my races, somedays you're the first one out of the drink, others you hit the wrong part of the beach, some days you are crusing at 30 mph effortlessly with a tail wind, and others you are stuck on a 20% grade crawling at 2 mph, You pull a marathon PR or are crawling over the line in a 5k. Last Year I didn't let life get me down, this year I did. I think my goal is to make next year alot more like last year and a hell of a lot less like this year. to keep a positive attitude to do what I need to do and most of what I want to do. To not worry about what other people think, afterall at the end of the day I'm the one who has to live with myself.



So I have made the decision Ironman New Zealand is where I'm heading, once again training through the cold( well I've still been swimming a running semi religiously but I need to get on the bike again.), once again with people screaming its suicide in my ear. I figure I like the race despite the logistical nightmare getting to it, it's worth it. The Kiwis are chill, the atmosphere is laid back, and except for some bad drivers it's a pretty fun race. As some of my teamamtes and family members put it "New Zealand is on everyone's top ten list and you might as well do it while you're young, single, and free.*" Most people tell me it's irrational, it defies logic, but then again doesn't voluntarily paying money and signing up to race 140.6 miles (226.2 km) seem a tiny bit irrational, figure if I'm going to do it I might as well go for the illogical trifecta.



Whether or not I'll race a lot of my local events remains to be seen, although I have 2 on the shortlist, one because I've done it every year it's been in existence and the other because it is my hometown sprint, but even then the local I want to race is only $50. I made a few mistakes last year in entering a lot of big name races, this year New Zealand is the biggie, unless I qualify for Kona. ( Dear Bree Wee, young broke age group seeking homestay, knows how to cook, clean, do windows.), regardless I'm going back.

Now all that leaves is training, having done this whole shabang last year, I know the best winter training spots around. My masters team is in full swing, and I can eek out an hour or two to run pretty easily. So I'm going back to Taupo and hopefully, I get that magic ticket punched to the Big Island.

Life is short, Race hard.
R.D.

Finally it all sinks in....

"It was a few hours later I was at home having a shower when it hit me, you really did that." - Faris Al-Sultan on winning the 2005 Ironman World Championship.

As seen by some of my blog posts my life hasn't really been on the up swing in a while. It's only recently that the fact that I've done an Ironman, I've PR-ed in marathons, I've done more in a year than most people do in a life time has finally hit me. The last 8 months have been difficult as my dad lost his job, I was flooded out of my house, suffered fiscal hard ship and recently I had trouble getting my butt to write papers. Tonight I could add another blow to that pile of disappointments, a realtionship that wasn't...maybe we are better off as just friends,maybe it's karma getting back at me,or maybe it's the hand of fate twisting me in a new dircetion. I think back to that rainy day back in March in Taupo. by all accounts there is no way in hell I should have finished as well as I did. It was raining, it was windy, and I was bonking hardcore on the bike. I didn't manage a single Century in training, most of my riding was around a flat sheltered lake in Northwestern CT,yet I managed to finish in a modest 6:18 on that leg. I went out in the run in shoes I had bought at a local shop 4 days...yes that's right 4 days before the Ironman. I ran in them twice, and they were shredding the skin off my heels like a cheese grater, by all accounts I should have been hobbling to medical with my head in my hands begging the tri gods for mercy...instead I ran a marathon PR ...yes a PR (granted my first marathon was a suffer fest.) by 6minutes,and finsihed in under 11:30. Maybe it was because I surrounded myself with the right people, listened to the right stuff,drew inspiration on why I wanted to do Ironman, why I needed to do Ironman. Seriously there is no way in hell I should have gone to Taupo last year. My parents were in a rough patch, I got the money to pay my airfare at the absolute last second, my training was haphazzard at best, but for some reason I made it. I did it on a wing and a prayer. For the first time in my life I believed that I could do anything, it was as if failure didn't apply to me,that the unconfident kid that boarded a plane at JFK had suddenly become something more. That all those "you're nuts" "wouldn't you rather do a sprint race?" "You'll never..."comments didn't exist. For the past 8 months that feeling has been buried by debt, deadlines, family issues, personal issues, fear and doubt. It's time to dig through the ashes and pull out those feelings again, that I can do anything attitude again...to suit up in that lycra armor and show myself that I am worth it again.That I can do it again. That the world can do what it did March 1, 2008 at 6:13 PM That it can kiss my hairy red ass because I am an Ironman! And God damn it I'm going to do it again! So all those to all those so called experts who are saying I can't I've got two words: WATCH ME!

R.D.

Ironman ready in 3 months?

Well I'm really considering going back to New Zealand if there are still entries available in late December, a few friends are talking me into it a few more are talking me out of it... it's a constant tug of war. I wasn't able to enter IM Arizona through genral entry and Bjoern's knee is shot so he didn't enter. The more I look at how much it would cost me to do an American Ironman the more New Zealand is looking appealing and "do-able" My pal Gary from HEAT wrote, " Rob, you'll have your entire life to do races like Kentucky and Arizona but New Zealand is on everyone's top 3 list and you have the shot to do it twice." My trigger finger is itching just to enter and be done with then I could justify long training hours, and get my self out of my personal ninth circle of doubt and fear and I can start looking forward.

Another reality has also hit, I haven't trained the way I did last year. At this time last year I had all my cold weather gear, stocked up on toe warmers and was riding 100 miles a week, this year..eh not so much. I have swam a little more and ran a little more but it was not to the same extent as last year. So I sit here in late November debating on if I can be Ironman ready in 3 months, would NZ be a folly, should I just do Kentucky which would give me almost 9 months to train. Should I do both? What about Kona implications? My self assuredness took a hit, this year, yet I was riding at minimum 60 miles a week. The weather ( with the exception of last week ) has been somewhat mild and part of me is wondering if it's a sign to do Ironman New Zealand , if I don't do it will I be kicking myself in 20 years. 3 months to build bike mileage and get my swim back into it's normal fast as hell shape, 3 months to get myself marathon ready again, 3 months, a quarter of a year, I've done it before I'll do it again. Even if I'm not bound for the land of the kiwis I'd sure as hell like to train like I am.

R.D.

Distractions

" Alright Boys you're in season, time to dump the girl friend, stop playing on your computer late at night and tell your boss to pound sand." - Art Rodriguez

Ah yes the words of my former track coach at our first practice of the season...let the memories from high school flow back.
The reasons I'm quoting him go back to the girl friend part. Normally this was never a problem. Afterall I believed I was the marked one, the guy that no girl in her right mind would date, and I was cool with that, sure it hurt sometimes, but it allowed me the freedom to train when I wanted on demand. In essence I was training free of "distractions", well ok there are always some distractions " will I have enough to pay for my race entry?", "my parents are driving me nuts.", "I hope I finish this ride before the library closes so I can do some research"...etc. But this year I had 3 girls competing for my affections, 1 was just a fling..which was a little awkward....but it was sort of an ego boost but it also has moral and ethical complications, for as much as I claim I'm a forward thinker, there still is a good little Catholic kid stuck inside of me. Girl number 2 we kissed but not really much to build a romantic relationship on , I mean we'd be good friends but I just don't think she's girl friend material. Then there is girl number 3..we went out in Newport, she's kinda into me I'm kinda into her, but I don't know where this is heading...and now I've got Coach Rod's voice echoing in my head about "girlfriends being run killers." I mean that's what happened in Newport, we went out on Saturday night and instead of going for a nice 8 miler along the cliff walk we just chilled on Sunday. The sad thing is I only know how to train one way and that is just planning for school and weather, I never had the girlfriend thing to worry about, and when I was first getting started in this sport, I chose the sport over a girl who couldn't understand why I spent so much on my freaking bike...I just don't want to be the poor sap at Eagleman who worked his tail off for years for a Kona spot and his wife made him return it, granted it's not like she isn't athletic, she's a former gymnast, she still runs a couple times a week with my sister...so she understands the rigors of commitment, but this is uncharted waters for me, I might have to submit this question to Bro. But that's what's been going on in my head for the last couple of days. I'm trying to get my butt into shape for Ironman New Zealand but it's been hard because of all this crap going on I need to focus, so this weekend back to basics, just running, riding and studying, no distractions.

R.D.